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Dating in Indian Culture - The Truth

Updated on August 18, 2013

Does dating exist in India? The answer would be Yes. However, does dating exist in India as it does in other Western Countries? Well, the answer would be a clear “No.” In Western countries, dating is encouraged from the teenage years itself so that one can find the best possible match. Spending some time with each other, traveling together, visiting each other’s homes, and living in with each other for years and even having kids before they take the important decision of marrying each other – all these form a part of the dating routine there. If this is dating, then it is evident that India has a long way to streamline this into its culture

In fact, it can be said that the concept of dating in Indian culture takes an altogether different meaning. Contrary to the Western world, parents form an integral part of the “Indian dating” process. Here, culture, caste, religion and the level of education are some of the important deciding factors in a relationship that should end in marriage.

Parents are important!

Earlier, parents were given the responsibility to find the best match for their children. They consider the financial status, education and most importantly the religion and caste of the prospective brides and grooms before “rounding off” the right one. Many a time, the marriage is fixed (say, engaged) even when the bride or groom are kids so that they grow up and then enter into the relationship of marriage. This is a very contrasting practice to what happens in Western countries.

Even though there have been significant advances in the living style, most of the youngsters would still want their parents’ blessings before they enter marital life. However, there have been an increasing number of cases wherein there are couples who decide to tie the knot without bothering about the caste, religion or the expectations of their parents– many a time, the parents never accept them back into their lives and it is considered as a crime or as an act of embarrassment.

Nowadays, there have been considerable changes at the Indian dating front. Parents are liberal regarding permitting youngsters to date whom they like. But still a large number of youngsters seek their parent’s opinion before they date someone or would want to marry someone

Notably, in metropolitan cities, where the life is too busy, marriages between individuals from different castes a religions does not create as much news or furore as that in villages. This is a sign that Indians ready to accept and are welcoming changes in their lives. Whatever is the end result, the acceptance and permission of parents is still an unavoidable aspect in dating and marriages.

Arranged Marriage/Indian Dating

Does caste matter?

Even though many of us would like to say that caste does not matter, a relation that ends in marriage also involves two families on the way. Many a time, when the bride and
groom are from two different religions, their compatibility may be affected to some extent, but not every time. For instant, if the woman is from a very ritualistic Hindu family, then she might not be prepared to face the surprises in a Christian family if she is planning to date a Christian.

However, this does not mean that there are no inter-caste or inter-religion marriages at all in India. Many times, especially in rural areas, it is sad that people look down upon such relationships and this very factor programs their minds to the concept that dating “out of the box” is risky. In such cases, one prefers to stick by traditions by choosing the match from within their group.

Is this Dating?

Before even the girl and boy see each other, the elders decide. Engagement is a function like marriage. Many people tend to get the marriage function conducted within a short period of time from the engagement. Most of the couples fall in love with each other after this arranged marriage. Strangely, there are marriages wherein the girl and boy see each other only on the day of marriage. Apparently, this is how dating supposed to work in India traditionally.

Nowadays, parents give the freedom to youngsters to date and find their match. However, this does not mean that they can date as many as they want before they enter marriage. The increase in the number of matrimonial websites and Indian dating sites proves the fact that dating is slowly becoming a part of the Indian culture. Metropolitan cities have started to whole heartedly welcome couples who want to date and live in. All these show that dating do exist in India; however, it is yet to be accepted completely into the society as that in Western countries.

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